Morning Conference Hour Presentations

The Conference Hours are one of the highlights of the Northfield day. Imagine sitting in a large yet cozy living room after a delightful breakfast, listening with friends to a deeply-experienced life story. For an hour and a half each morning, a member of the Northfield Community shares his or her personal story and insights, as they relate to the year’s theme, “The Art of Peace.” In this way, we learn more how individual lives are shaped by the social, cultural, spiritual, and psychological challenges that are part of every person’s journey.

On Monday, Chantal Bassous was our first Conference Hour speaker. Chantal is from Montreal but lives in Toronto, with her husband Mark and young daughter Atara, both also at the conference. Chantal’s family is Iraqi Jewish and lived in Baghdad for many generations. Her parents fled Iraq in 1956, lived in France, then moved to Montreal, where Chantal was born. In her parent’s memory, Baghdad was a truly multicultural city, almost magical in its mystery and beauty. In her talk, Chantal explored the experience of growing up Canadian with an Iraqi Jewish heritage, particularly the way in which her relationship choices as a teen, young adult and grown woman reflected her struggle to find her own sense of identity.

Bill Milford was our Conference Hour speaker on Tuesday. Bill is a folk singer/social worker, who lives with his wife and young daughter in Connecticut. He returned to Northfield after a 20 year absence. Bill’s presentation combined both talking and singing, as he sang his own songs and discussed what was going on in his life when he wrote them. Among many other topics, Bill talked about his experience of recurrent melanoma, diagnosed 2 years ago, and the impact his recovery has had on him and his family. Bill talked about the challenge, true for many of us, of reconciling “what I know with what I feel.” The importance of relationships at Northfield was a theme of Bill’s talk, and what came through is the way that people touch base with the conference after many years away.

Mickey and Mike Friedman reflected on their 54-year (and counting) marriage at our Wednesday conference hour. Mickey is a late-blooming gerontologist and Mike is a retired lawyer. They are the parents of five and grandparents of twelve (several of whom were at the conference). In their talk, the Friedmans described their experiences of the Great Depression, World War 2, their marriage and courtship, how they wrestled with Jewish identity in the post-war world of America, and parenting from the 1950s into the 21st Century! Many of us were relieved to learn that “even after 54 years, you can learn things about each other.” The Friedmans made a major life change in the 1970s, moving from Hartford to rural Maine. Mike shared his thoughts on the balance of despair and hope in our lives. He commented too that when we make significant changes in our lives, there often also is significant resistance in our friends, who may feel threatened by those very changes.

On Thursday, our conference hour speaker was Rev. C. John Thompson-Quartey. John is a native of Ghana, born into an aristocratic tribal family. He came to this country in 1983 and was ordained to the priesthood in 1997. He is now a chaplain at the St. Pauls School in Concord, NH. He attended the conference with his wife Jerlyn and their three lovely daughters, aged 8, 5, and 2. John interspersed African drumming through his presentation. Among many topics, he talked about his experience of religion and faith growing up into adulthood, and how African tribal rituals met Christian beliefs and rituals. While an Anglican from an early age, John explored with us the impact, as a member of an African culture, of praying to a white, blond, blue-eyed Jesus and the ways that religious symbols can be laden with Western imperialism. His presentation stressed the truth that: ”no matter how insignificant you think your life is, you have a story to tell, and it is in the telling of the story, with its full authenticity, that we come to recognize our own humanity.”

On Friday, John Grillo gave a fascinating presentation on his college year-abroad in Japan. John is 20 years old and has been coming to Northfield for several years. Through Long Island University, John spent the past year studying in Kyoto, Japan, where he arrived with 2 bags and little knowledge of Japanese. His fellow students were from Alaska, Illinois, Michigan, and elsewhere in America. John focused on learning as much as he could about Japanese art. His program involved a strong reliance on a tutorial model, where John was able to study with practitioners of Japanese music, calligraphy, paper making, and other mediums. “The key is breath,” John pointed out--using your breathing to center yourself in your artistic practice. John reflected with us on the question: “What is a kid from Connecticut doing living in a house of smoked bamboo in Kyoto, making Japanese paper at the side of a master?” His answer: “Because I wanted it. Because I encouraged myself to make it happen.” His presentation was a wonderful meditation on taking risks, empowering yourself, as well as on the ways in which language shapes consciousness itself.

John Thompson-Quartey summed up the essence of Conference Hours, and perhaps of Northfield as a whole, when he said: “no matter how insignificant you think your life is, you have a story to tell, and it is in the telling of the story, with its full authenticity, that we come to recognize our own humanity.” And listening to all the Conference hours was an equally great gift that we all received from the speakers.

Northfield Families
Each Conference Hour is followed by a meeting of Northfield “Families.” For many of us at Northfield, this is the heart of the conference. A Northfield Family is a group of approximately 10 individuals of different ages (including teens), all from different “real” families, who meet together each day after Conference Hour for the second half of the morning to get to know each other, to talk, listen and play together. Each family retains its same membership all week, so that the conversation deepens as the week goes on. Family members are bound by rules of confidentiality. Often people share their reactions to topics that have come up at conference hour. One teen participant described Families as “a time to get all the burdens off your chest that you’ve been carrying all year.”

Afternoons
While the mornings are filled with activities that we all do together, the afternoons are a chance to take advantage of a wide variety of organized activities. Or alternatively, one can sit and chat with a friend, take a walk or bike ride in the beautiful countryside, or even just take a nap.

There were 18 workshops offered by community members, ranging from “Making Peace with our Parents” and “Retirement: The Fountain of Age?” to “Drum Making” and “Healing Messages from the Body.” Friendly matches of soccer, basketball, and capture the flag were organized for kids of all ages, many with gray hair. The indoor swimming pool was always a popular hangout.

Evenings at Billings
Two Monday workshops were the starting points for week-long craft projects that became a focus (obsession?) of activity in Billings, which is a building open every evening for dancing, singing, talking, drawing, scrabble, and snacking. In alignment with the week’s theme “The Art of Peace,” we all folded oragami cranes..., and more cranes..., and more, striving to fulfill the legendary gaggle of A Thousand Cranes.

Similarly, luminaries were created all week, by drawing on paper and then wrapping that artwork around votive candle stands. On Friday night, we got to walk thru a magical pathway in front of Billings, framed by almost 100 of these lanterns.

Tales From The Northfield Coffeehouse
On Wednesday of the Northfield week, we again gathered for an evening of original poetry and fiction by members of the Northfield community, coordinated by Lisa Church and Sam Osherson.

Through the efforts of Kathy Lowe and Kim McClellan, one of the rooms at Billings was transformed into a comfortable place to relax, have informal conversation and enjoy the presentations. The walls were graced by the spectacular photographs of Bruce McClellan, the wonderful, playful petroflection photography created by Kathy Lowe, the superb landscape watercolors of Holly Friesen, and Anne Berenson‘s original photographs of poppies, hibiscus, and tulips. Peter Bloch lent us two of his unique lamps--base and lampshade of rich, grained wood--with their special warmth. We were lucky to have as well three colorful mandelas created by the teen group, working in pairs.

The room was open all week long for informal gatherings, and most evenings many people gathered to play music and sing together. On Wednesday, the coffeehouse was devoted to original poetry, journal writings, and short stories from members of the community. Holly McClain read several poems written by her son Matt at age 7, including “Mother:” “Mother’s in the wind/Mother’s in the sky/Mother’s in the sea/Mother is stuck with me.” Bill Milford read a lovely poem-ode written for his father, “The Joy You Know.” Allison Bishop offered us powerful imagery of self-search in her poem, “Howl”: “I am swallowed by silence/like gulping solid air/chilled by the west wind/and a polar hand.” The poet “breathes through it” and pushes through her terror: “Until I am sliced open/by a warm hand/and generous heart/and my head falls back/my mouth open/And I can howl again.”

Poets were well-represented at this year’s coffeehouse. Connie Walsh read her lovely poem about the loss and rediscovery of a beloved childhood doll while searching her mother’s attic. Nancy Ramsden read a poem inspired by the Peace rally in New York City in February:

Adam Knowles and Joey Stafford-Abbot (both teens) read their recent poem, “The squirrels of Northfield”: “The squirrels are really fun to chase/Sometimes I think I’m in a race/The race stops whenever they go up a tree/Then they are the ones to laugh, hee-hee.”

The Northfield Talent Show
Well, the talent here was too numerous, and too…, well, talented, to do justice in this short space. This year’s show was coordinated masterfully by Tom Bloch and Max Webb. Suffice it to say that the children and adults came on stage to show off their dancing, singing, and comedic taents as the whole community gathered in the Auditorium. Among the high points….This year we had a new generation of Crazy Canuks, as Joey, Toonie, Brianna, Mike, Mariah, and Kirsten did an hysterical job as they took over for the adults, who are surely still crazy after all these year….Claudetter and Loreene did a make over of the two Rons, Lindsay, and Andrew….while Lorrie and Ellie Weinstein finally explained to us all “the evolution of humanoid Northfieldies,” with the help of a recently discovered “relic” (see photo). The joy of the evening is well-expressed by Hayley and Alessia (ages ), with their “knock, knock” joke:
Knock, Knock.
Who’s there?
Will
Will who
Will you take me to Northfield?

Meetings
Northfield is created and run by the members -- there are no paid administrators or presenters. So one feature of the June week is a set of meetings, where we share ideas, create consensus and understanding, and basically take ownership for the future of our conference. In addition to the normal Wednesday Community Meeting, and the Friday Annual Meeting, there were some impromptu “Early Bird Discussions.” At the invitation of Betsy Stout, about 15 Northfielders gathered in the living room of Gould from 7-8 am on Thursday and Friday for an informal and frank exchanges on the differences between us as well as the bonds that hold us together as a community. We are learning to listen well to each other, to talk directly, and to tolerate the differences as well as communalities between us. We hope to continue this exchange at Midwinter and at next year’s conference, although hopefully at a time more conducive to larger participation!

What Do Teens Love About Northfield?
As a multigenerational gathering, Northfield is particularly committed to teens and to fostering adult-teen dialogue. Teens are welcome at morning Conference Hours and to participate in Northfield Families. Here is a snapshot of quotes from teens, about what aspects of the week they particularly enjoyed:
• “I love the potato salad and boca burgers at the barbecue!,”
• “All the songs. Having an extremely random conversation with Mr and Mrs ----- while brushing my teeth in the bathroom. The subject was pointy-toed shoes and foot binding.”
• “I liked the High-Five Ropes adventures because it showed us our strengths and weaknesses as a team. The whole Teen program was close to perfect this year.
• “Hanging out after lunch and dinner with the rest of the group.”
• “The chance to learn how to DJ, from a real disc-jockey!”
• “Billings! The crafts, music, dancing, etc.”
• “I liked sleeping, because Billings was really good--it made me stay up late at night.”
• “I like doing things with my age group. We all blend together well and are very alike. It helps us gain respect. (age 13)”
• “The swimming pool!”
• “The cafeteria brownies!”

What Do Adults Love About Northfield?
Sometimes the most wonderful moments at Northfield are the unexpected ones, conversations over scrabble in Billings or singing in our evening service, or watching the developing friendships between our children and other adults. For many, the week represents an opportunity to renew friendship and relationship that may go back years and across generations, and then to add new friends to our list of loved-ones. Many of us cherish the opportunity to express playful as well as serious parts of ourselves. Many of the adults cherish their time with other children and teens. Some of the friendships between teens and adult go back many years; some members of the community who are now parents themselves remember the importance of their conversations with Northfield adults through difficult times in their own teen and young adult years.

• “Singing, singing, singing….laughing”
• “The opportunity to reenvision our community at the Early Bird meetings”
• “The Talent show was wonderful! It’s great to see how creative and secure the kids are to be able to stand up in front of the group. The Crazy Canucks were great!”
• “Friends, laughter, GOOD conversations, meaningful encounters.”
• “Vigorous aerobic exercise I built into my week.”
• “After a long night of playing scrabble, there’s nothing like the relaxing sound of the frogs croaking away as you fall asleep in Marquand.”
• “Conversations over origami crane-making in Billings were the best!”
• “Thank you, Bill, for all the music.”
• “Nothing particularly special -- I just like being here.”
• “I love the friendly kitchen staff. Thank you so much!”
• “Families.”
• “People speaking authentically their feelings and thoughts”
• “Conference hour speaker John Thompson-Quarty’s joking about his mis-adventures.”
• “Watching my children grow!”
• “Chanting peace with the crystal bowl”
• “Sacred Circle on Wednesday night was so filled with the holy spirit. I felt so moved by the singing.”
• “Peace change at Sacred Circle -- the spontaneous eruption of spirit.”
• “Singing ‘Like A Ship in the Harbor’ in the Music Hall and hearing the sound swell up around the room, along with all the memories that song brings to me.”
• “The loving support of my Northfield family and the entire community throughout this incredible week. Once again, the entire journey that is Northfield was incredible. Once again, the Northfield community itself is what made it so.”
• “The Conference Hour speakers -- all of them!”

From The Kids In the Children’s Program
• Loved the food!
• I like when adults play with us.
• The friendship bracelet we made in the children's program is really special to me.
• Peace is really about knowing that everyone has a different way of being peaceful.
• The game zip-zap was really fun.
• So why is this called the Northfield conference? It should be called the Northfield family.
• We really worked together at the ropes course.
• I always like the talent show the best.
• All those hats on the guys at the talent show was really funny!
• I like playing at the frog pond.
• Dress-up was fun.
• The Water Follies was funny.